Tuesday, April 5, 2011

The Top 3 Dirty Old Men at the Miss Mountain High Bikini Pageant

It might be nearing the end of season for most of us, but for Snowboarder Mag and Mountain High resort last weekend was peak season – it was the weekend of the annual Miss Mountain High Bikini Pageant.
Everyone wins; Mountain High get buckets of free press coverage, the winning girl gets a free season pass, tickets to some heavy metal gigs and a bikini and Snowboard Mag get a massive influx of new site visitors. Last year’s Miss Mountain High is currently the most viewed set-of photos on Snowboarder Mag’s website and already this year’s event is in at number 4. That’s pretty bonkers given the quantity of other photographs that appear on the site. 
What really makes the photos though are shots of the dirty old men who flock to the event (and clearly to the Snowboarder Mag site). Here are the top three leery blokes from the Miss Mountain High competition...

3. Sinister Cricket Geezer

He’s brought a video camera and he’s not there for the snowboarding. This guy really should be on some sort of watch list.

Although the single representative from the winner Christina's fan club is undoubtedly an odd cat, we can't tear our eyes away from the all-pervasively malign stare of Sinister Cricket Geezer.

2. Ecstatic Flailing Guy

Never on the history of mankind has someone enjoyed seeing girls in bikinis more... 

than Ecstatic Flailing Guy on the bottom left

Here he is again, still euphoric. (Also keep an eye out in this picture for a guy who just narrowly missed out on the list - Hollering Slut T-shirt Man)

If Ecstatic Flailing Guy actually saw a naked girl he would instantaneously explode.

1. Giant Hairy Cowboy

This guy dominated the 2010 event, but sadly he did not make an appearance at this year’s event.  Let's reminisce...

He's a human butt moth - uncontrollably drawn to women's arses

Here he is again and again with the same look of gormless admiration

But what makes Giant Hairy Cowboy amazing other than his sheer scale, his attention to detail and his consistent facial expression, is his gravity-defying ability to hold up last year’s winner Chelsea with a single arm.

whilst enjoying a sneaky grope at the same time.

Congratulations to our winner - Giant Hairy Cowboy.

If you would prefer not to spend you time looking at ugly blokes then you can see the other photos from the event at the Snowboarder Mag site. Here’s the 2010 event and here’s the 2011 event

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