Writing an article on the internet is a bit like writing a book on a typewriter that occasionally prints out a page of hardcore porn. While we research our weekly articles we unavoidably come across some pretty strange things on the edge of the snowboarding world and because we are committed internet journalists, when we spot a trend, no matter how weird or offensive it is, we feel it’s our job to share them with you. This week we look at a very strange snowboarding niche developed by some pretty disturbing minds – Erotic Snowboard Art. Warning - towards the end it’s definitely NSFW and very probably not much good for your soul either...
Last week we did some serious research and analysis. This week it’s pictures.
First we'll take a look at the pictures that were done by decent artists before things really take a turn for the worse...
|That's a 2004 Nitro Suprateam, if you're interested (via)|
|A strange combination of math and art, this was titled "Underboob + Sno bunny equals WIN" (via)|
|Continuing the underboob theme here's some de Vinchi inspired underboob action (via)|
|Bit nippy out. (via)|
|More nipple action. Not sure what's going on in the marshmallow legs though. (via)|
|Thus guy takes underboobs and nipples to the max and then tops it off with a dog-faced hat. (via)|
|A sketch by a bona fide Emmy winning illustrator. (via)|
As promised, this is the point that thing's start to go downhill...
|Giving an unwanted glimpse into the artist's mind, this was titled "Snowboardin' whore"|
|Now this really is an erotica niche - Snowboarding polar bear/girls.|
|Under-dressed girl struggles to ride a spatula|
|Japan. Odd place.|
|"It's like sex!" said the naked man wearing his goggles as a garter and a massive dreamcatcher hairpiece.|
|cliff dropping on a hockey stick|
|This painting is available for a cool $350, but judging by the snowboard gear no one has parted with their cash for close to 15 years.|
A bunch of 10 year old kids having a good time snowboarding.
You know, 10 year old kids like Linda Maltinie...
|So many levels of wrong|
|Not a single bit of this makes sense to me. Thank god they at least put clothes on her this time.|
That's enough desecration of the Snowboard Kids game. Let's finish off by desecrating some other childhood memories.
|The artist described this as "A sexy analogue of the Silver Surfer. Need I say more?"... Probably not mate, best stop talking right there.|
|and...there goes all my happy memories of ice lollies|
|Mr/Miss December, thanks for fucking up Christmas|
If you want to continue to trawl through the seedy side of the snowboarding internet why not try our Porn Gear Guide.
Or, if you want to continue this terrifying glimpse into the minds of internetkind, explore further and have a look at the art of Shaun White fans.