Friday, April 3, 2009

illicit's Guide to Snowboard Tattoos


Getting a tattoo, it's a very important decision to get right. I look back at photos from a few years ago and I'm amazed just how badly my fashion choices have aged. I can only imagine how disappointing it would be having to look at some of these tattoos in the mirror for the rest of my life. Let's take a look at the damage.

Freaky snowman snowboarder tattoo...

This tattoo has been removed from the web and all I could see was the small image from Google Image Search. Still, it so incredibly freaky it does deserve to be included.

A great reminder that tattoos don't tend to age well, check out this zombie-faced beauty from circa 1995...

Celebrating the snowboard commute...
At least the first one was well done. This one looks like it was tattooed by a the work experience kid.

Hand Plant...

The only possible reason why he is hand-planting into a scroll of flesh would be that the selected tattoo artist can't draw hands.
This one is nice and colourful..

And this one is deep and meaningful...
That's enough of this classic landscape art, lets look at some cartoons...
I think the writing on the wall may be trying to tell you something mate.

Anatomical madness...

and her friend got the same one...
Or maybe it's the same person and the tattoo is moving. Freaky!

This tattoo defines the word radical! ...

The snowboarder celebrates his creation of a poo mountain

But at least we know there is some basis for that one. What the hell is a picture of B B Wing the snowboarding elephant trying to say?...
That was a impressive array of bad decisions. What influenced these people to do this to themselves? I blame celebrities...
Here's Kat Von Dee, a tattoo artist from one of those telebox shows.
She is awkwardly standing beside a snowboard she designed. Kat Von Dee is not a snowboarder herself (so she won't be appearing in the hallowed list of Snowboarding Celebrities) but some snowboarders are involved in this conspiracy.
Pro snowboarder Tara Dakides sports a huge tattoo, which is just about the only thing keeping her warm in her impractical winter attire...

I found an interview with Tara and one of the questions explains the thinking behind this tattoo:
This tattoo has been forever evolving and its still not done. I started it when I was 18 and it has been 2 cover ups to what it is now. It certainly is a story but the short is........its a blue alian looking women in a cocoon serounded by fire. Theres an eye that is attached to the cocoon that wraps around my hip. What it mean to me is, staying in a calm place while serounded by chaos. That's something I try to do in my life and in this world.

That's the actual spelling in the article. I like that she has tried to cover it over twice and it still looks bad and makes no sense.

Here's pro snowboarder Danny Kass getting tattooed by pro snowboarder Jamie Lynn...
Kass' face puts the board into snowboarding.

Danny Kass, runs a snowboarding company that mainly makes snowboard gloves called Grenade
Now they are good gloves but they are still just gloves. But some people think this is something they want to tattoo on themselves like this fella...

This guy also has a Grenade tattoo, except he doesn't snowboard. He is a UFC cage fighter that just wanted the silly hand look. Still I wouldn't say anything about it to his face...
These Granade tattoos celebrating the art of producing and marketing gloves, bring us on to the other main genre of snowboarding tattoos - Tattooing the brand of a snowboarding company onto yourself.

Never Summer tattoo...
This tattoo says so much and yet strangely also so little.
Jesus this is a bad one.
Airblaster tattoo...
Rome tattoos...

He looks like a branded leopard.

another Rome tattoo sported by a sort of Nu Rave / Emo cross breed...

Why wear just one glove?
Maybe she is just a very bad dresser. Putting on your goggles, beanie and gloves before you put on the rest of your snowboarding gear will only result in subsequent dressing difficulties.

But the most determined brand to literally brand up it's followers is Ride. They organise a yearly cult meeting where people attend such a boring looking party that literally the only way to remain entertained/awake is to get a tattoo.
(Video of one of the events is available on the Ride site here)
Check out some of these examples...

And here are some of the excitable initiates.
Maybe the reason for all the gurning is that the guy in the right has just let one rip.

Man I want to go to this party. This one lad is having so much fun!...

Having that much fun can't be legal!

What about skiers? I only have one example of a skier with a tattoo. There were loads but this is a snowboard site and anyway this one speaks for them all..
A skier - A tattooed arse
That's enought naked flesh for one week. Unless I find some really extreme snowboard tattoos this will be the only snowboarding tattoo article I will do. That's unless someone is up for trying this with a snowboard theme and then I will dedicate the whole site to them...
So long guys

If you want to check out more snowboarding inspired art check out illicit Art Attack #1 - Pascal Jean Delorme in a blog near you.


  1. illicit... Oh I get it you guys are making a pun on how ill you are... fail

    Why all the hate in this post?

  2. Just to let ya know, the snowboarding elephant is actually "Woolly" the mammoth. Its the logo from Mammoth Mountain Ski Resort in California. Its a world renoun resort with one of the best parks in the states. As for the "BB Wing" im still lost on that one.

  3. Kat von D did not design that snowboard. It was by an artist named Andrei Molodkin. Other then that, good stuff.

  4. Fuck the systsem lmao?

  5. i dont get the person who did this??
    Isnt tattos suppose to show the character of the person?
    And the woman is wearing one glove as its called MODELLING...obviously the maker is a clam in his mums house at 42? or someone who just never got laid...peace

  6. i agree with brownie

  7. im getting a full sleeve on my left arm n i was thinkin chair lift a rider sprayin a few snow flakes and the Granade on my elbow statein drop cliffs not bombs wot u guys think

  8. the girl with the glove is my best friend.. she doesn't deserve to get hated on so shut your fuckin mouth. haters. fuck all of you.

    1. Thanks for the offer, but I've checked with the rest of the team and we don't fancy getting involved in the gang bang you've offered to be the centre of.


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