Thursday, October 25, 2012

Top 10 Lift LOLs & The Bottom Half Of The Internet

In the last article we wanted to test the hypothesis that the only two things people read about were tits and Shaun White. To test it we combined the two topics into one composite article and bloody hell was that theory proved correct. So far 9,382 people have read the article, 1,272 people shared it on the Facebook, 893 people hit the Like button and 4 people took time out of their busy schedules to complain  Based on the evidence we've learned that we should either just focus on Shaun White and tits from now on, or focus on testing scientific theories. We've chose the second option, so this week we test another theory:

It's said that if there were an infinite amount of monkeys hitting keys at random on typewriters, they would eventually produce the works of William Shakespeare. To test this theory we constructed YouTube. Let's see how close we've got to producing reams of great literature...

"Bas Ass"

"Probably this poor man is my neiborough"

Bowling for Germans
The monkeys must have been on a smoking break for this video. Move on...

"He woulda piss on his face"

And now for a good old fashioned skier/snowboarder debate...

And neverlandssnowboards, one of the most productive monkeys, has rather impressively managed to sustain his anger for almost an entire year. He was still trolling away merrily in this comments section just last week.

Just in case you were wondering skiers do come a cropper on chair lifts too...
Cue the blooper reel
No monkeys here yet either. Are they on another break? What are they up to? Someone keep an eye on them, we don't want any of that Planet of the Apes shit breaking out again.

"holy carp"


"where the fuck his head go"

"i'd die of ebarssment"

Well that was disappointing, it took bloody ages to whip-up that bloody website and there's little sign of coherent language. We'll have to check back in another few years. Hope you enjoyed the LOLs.

This is what we would have done if we had more time and any skills...

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Shaun White being a dick. 9,382 people can't be wrong can they? Well they could be if they were YouTube commenters.

A compressive infographic on major ski lift accidents for any fans of ski lift facts. This was compiled two years ago and the good news is that since then there have been no significant levels of ski-lift related deaths.  

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